


Goodbye, my Love

by Jux_ta_pose



Category: Anne of Green Gables (TV 1985) & Related Fandoms, Anne of Green Gables - L. M. Montgomery, Anne with an E (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-07
Updated: 2019-10-07
Packaged: 2020-11-26 19:00:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 944
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20935160
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jux_ta_pose/pseuds/Jux_ta_pose
Summary: This is based around a scene in episode 3 of Season 3 of "Anne with an E" between Anne Shirley-Cuthbert and Gilbert Blythe.If you haven't seen this episode please read no further. I can't say no more, hurting.All mistakes are my own, enjoy maybe.





	Goodbye, my Love

“Think I’ll walk.”

“May I join you.”

“Suit yourself.”

“I... c… I can’t fathom it”

“I don’t think I can be a doctor. Doctor’s are supposed to… I was… I had to tell her, but I…”

“Oh… Gilbert”

“No don’t ! I’m not the one dying. I’m not the one who's losing everything, I’m just…”

“A friend who delivered the most terrible news to someone they love.”

“Mary needed me to be strong. I just made it worse. I couldn’t find the words and I made it worse.”

“Would she have been consoled by some dispassionate delivery. I hope you never have to do something like that again, but I don’t think you’ll be able to avoid it. People will come to you Gilbert and they will bring their children and everyone they hold dear to see a doctor who cares just as much as they do. You will be a wonderful doctor. Caring deeply will always be the right thing.”

****

It wasn’t fair, it wasn’t right for such a beautiful soul, such a treasured kindred spirit to be taken from this earth. Anne longed to believe that Doctor Ward was mistaken with his diagnosis. There were such a great many illnesses out there all with similar symptoms but not so severe an outcome, she’d seen them in Gilberts books. Anne knew they existed, if only. Surely god couldn’t be so cruel as to leave Delphine without a mother and Bash without his dearest love and Gilbert…

Oh Gilbert... to lose another part of his heart, his cherished little family has only just begun, forever shattered. It splintered Anne’s own heart to witness his distress, to feel so helpless in the face of his quiet anguish. To strive to find those perfect words that would soothe that perpetual frown but know you have nothing to offer.

To chatter on so and hope that it’s enough to be of some little comfort. Anne could not talk her way out of this plight, she didn’t even want to try she just wanted to be close incase he needed her.

Perhaps Gilbert had really just wanted to be alone with his thoughts but as usual she had invited herself on his private constitutional and like some pathetic creature she would not leave him to his personal misery, to mourn in peace. He was too merciful, gallant even in his pain. She was undeserving of the grateful expression he’d bestowed upon her like her words lifted some small weight from his burdened mind.

They arrived at the Blythe- Lacroix farm just as Marilla and Matthew were leaving to return to Green Gables and Bash reentered the house his gait that of a man truly in torment.

Gilbert and Anne paused, their feet suddenly felt like they were caked in heavy unrelenting soil. The reality of this day sunk into their bones and they both felt the exhaustion consume every muscle.

For Gilbert this moment brought him right back to that precipice. When his beloved father had died and his home was full of strangers, well meaning, but strangers just the same. Just like then he couldn’t will his feet to go forward.

Instead he’d run from it and the only one who had the tenacity, the sheer stubbornness to go after him that day was the girl at his side right now.

This time he couldn’t run but it all became just so overwhelming. Mary was like losing the mother he’d barely known. Who else would let him vent about his future and about a certain headstrong girl who had the ability to crush his heart on a daily basis. Who would listen to him prattle with such motherly patience like Mary and give such sound advice. He wanted to see her grow old with Bash and they would be the most doting, most nurturing grandparents to his own children one day.

Why?

It wasn’t fair, he’d lost so much.

It was almost spring and new life was bursting forth in every direction and he wanted to scream for it to stop, for one excruciating minute he wanted all life to cease. But that was monstrous, he couldn’t think like that.

It was too unkind.

Delphine was so young and she needed her mother, he needed her just as much but Gilbert knew that he would have to step up and be that big brother. He would not let Mary down, he would be strong for her, in her stead.

It just wasn’t fair. It wasn’t right.

The tears were streaming down his cheeks, but he didn’t care because it was hopeless, he felt useless in his own body and that was okay. That had to be okay.

He shook with the agony of all he was losing and his home swam in his watery vision like some demented prism. It taunted him, like a vulture watching and waiting to pick at his bones.

Anne’s presence by his side might have been the only thing that kept him rooted to the spot.

Gilbert felt Anne’s arms go around his neck and hold him close and he immediately let go of the breath that was trapped in his throat. He hugged her tightly, feeling the thunderous beating of her heart and the softness of her hair against his cheek. Gilbert closed his eyes tightly he had no desire to ever let her go because she was what he needed. Anne pushed him away so many times but she always had the uncanny ability to know just how to burrow her way back back into his heart.

One day, soon, they would need to have a serious conversation.

But not today.

**Author's Note:**

> I was not expecting at all the out come of episode 3x03 and I must say I was absolutely heart broken. Besides Anne and Gilbert , Mary was my favourite character (she was so warm and lovely and the relationship between her and Bash was adorable and the actress Cara Ricketts was delightful and so talented) and it destroys me to watch this episode and everything that goes down. I'm very sad and maybe a little pissed off.


End file.
